Entry #11 Metacognitive analysis

  Metacognitive analysis

Ruminating in the matter of my performance in this long process leads me to cogitate on the subject of my weaknesses. : First, I am unsatisfied with my own usage of lexical items in my writings. There is an always present feebleness of meaning which is the result of the lack of accuracy in the use of vocabulary appropriately. Secondly, there is a degree of fallibility in the conveyance of meanings due to grammar mistakes. Ignorance overpowers my productions. Thirdly, there is not only laziness but also revelry. This bad attitude is an innateness directive that draws me to dispel the rules: As an existentialist rebel, my trend is to break or forget the rules reflected as my great weakness. On the basis of these mentioned points, my weaknesses are part of me as I am part of them.

 Looking backwards to my former writings, one wonders which possible qualities I have improved. During these years in the teacher training college, the notion of different frameworks was what helped me to realize a formal schema so as to be readable. Through reading philosophy, literature and scientific researches I gained a bigger liar perspective to reach a minor relevant truth. Compulsively, I abuse, misuse and overuse of figures of speech showing a hypocrite sense in my writings in order to recreate events. Working in groups has been difficult due to shared inabilities to culminate in a shared goal. Those who have followed my writings are able to state that I have improved a bit but not enough.

The activity of writing as a process is essential to my own existence. Despite the fact of being often perceived as a cheerful student in class, I conceived myself not as a man but a legion. In writing different genres I discover new parts of me that exist unnoticed by others. In writing essays I have an emotional sensation of an enormous void or an abyss trying to rationalize to find the truth: not by words but with ideas. In writing novels, I attempt to avoid banality in the long process so as to act as a sentry or guardian of my original convictions. In writing tales or short stories allows me to have an arrogant sensation of creation from the ashes of what I had learned reading or in class, that god like capability to create an imaginary world grants me what everyman wants deeply: creatio ex nihilo: the false illusion of being a creator or divine deity. Poetry is the most difficult genre for me to write: the music produced from poetry crosses the infinite as a meteor in which language is used in full communication. In writing poetry, as a stoic writer I am more a fiend than a human: life-in-death. In spite the fact of finishing these courses, I will always be a learner: My existence multiplies every time I write by the mere reason of my petulant desire of keep learning in the process.

References:

Borges, J.L., (1952). Obras Completas II: Otras Inquisiciones. 4th ed. Argentina: emecé.

Coledridge. S.T., (2007). Selected Poems: The Rime of the Ancient Mariner. 10th ed. Isle of Man: Penguin Classics.

Outline:

1-      Paragraph by listing

Ts1: Thinking (Ruminating) about (in the matter of) my performance in this long process leads me to think (cogitate) about (on the subject of) my weaknesses.

Ss: First, I am unsatisfied with my own usage of lexical items in my writings. There is an always present vagueness of meaning which is the result of the lack of accuracy in the use of vocabulary appropriately.

Ss: Secondly, there is a degree of fallibility in the conveyance of meanings due to grammar mistakes. Ignorance overpowers my productions.

Ss1: Thirdly, there is not only laziness but also a bad attitude. This bad attitude is an innateness directive that draws me to dispel the rules. As an existentialist rebel, my trend is to break or forget the rules reflected in my punctuation marks.

Ss2: Not all this points reflect my real weaknesses which are beyond my partial perspective and possibly my real weakness after all.

Cs1: On the basis of these mentioned points, my weaknesses are part of me as I am part of them.

2-      Paragraph by listing

Tp2: Looking backwards to my former writings, one wonders which possibly qualities I have improved.

Ss: During these years in the teacher training college, the notion of different frameworks was what helped me to realize a formal schema so as to be readable.

Ss: Through reading philosophy, literature and scientific researches has given me a bigger liar perspective to reach a minor relevant truth.

Ss: Compulsively, I abuse, misuse and overuse of figures of speech showing a hypocrite sense in my writings in order to recreate events.

Ss: Working in groups has been difficult due to shared inabilities to reach (culminate) a shared goal.

Cs1: Those who have followed my writings are able to state that I have improved a bit but not enough.

3 - Paragraph by examples

Ts3: The activity of writing as a process is essential to my own existence.

Ss1: Despite the fact of being often perceived as a cheerful student in class, I conceived myself not as a man but a legion.

Ex1: In writing different genres I discover new parts of me that exist unnoticed by others. In writing essays I have an emotional sensation of an enormous void or an abyss trying to rationalize to find the truth: not by words but with ideas.

Ex2: In writing novels, I attempt to avoid banality in the long process so as to act as a sentry or guardian of my original convictions.

Ex3: In writing tales or short stories allows me to have an arrogant sensation of creation from the ashes of what I had learned reading or in class, that god like capability to create an imaginary world grants me what everyman wants deeply: creatio ex nihilo: the false illusion of being a creator or divine deity.

Ex4: Poetry is the most difficult genre for me to write: the music produced from poetry crosses the infinite as a meteor in which language is used in full communication. In writing poetry, as a stoic writer I am more a fiend than a human: life-in-death.

Cs3: In spite the fact of finishing these courses, I will always be a learner: My existence multiplies every time I write by the mere reason of my petulant desire of keep learning in the process.

Entry N#10 Essay!

In order to have a look at my horrible horrible presentation click here

Notes:

Elements: of Writing an Effective Essay

·         What is an Essay?

1.       An organized piece of writing that focuses on a single topic.

2.       Organized around a general idea or thesis.

3.1. Thesis develops from all the main ideas in the supporting paragraphs.

3.2. Paragraphs that develop the Thesis are the body of the Essay.

3.3. Begins with an introduction.

3.4. Ends with a concluding paragraph.

·         Why write an Essay?

1.       Writing an essay helps you express your ideas more clearly and effectively.

2.       It helps you to convey information in a small amount of space.

3.       They can be entertaining by recounting interesting stories about ourselves and others.

4.       A required part of almost all college courses.

·         Recognizing General and Specific

1.       General-Big and Inclusive.

2.       Specific and Smaller or more exact or precise

3.       Examples:   General to Specific

                     Mammals_Human Beings_Females_Mary

·         The following chart compares the elements of paragraphs and essays

1.       Paragraph:        

1.1. Organized around main idea.

1.2. Introductory sentence.

1.3. Developed by supporting details.

1.4. Concluding sentence.

2.       Essay:

2.1. Organized around a thesis.

2.2. Introductory paragraph.

2.3. Developed by supporting paragraphs.

2.4. Concluding paragraph.

·         Thesis

1.1. What you are writing about a supporting through your thesis?

1.2. Like the main idea of a supporting paragraph, it’s a generalization and includes all paragraphs in your essay.

·         Thesis Statement

1.1. A sentence in the essay that states the thesis.

1.2. Usually states in the first paragraph as part of the introduction.

1.3. Should be “just right”

Not too general or it will not provide an adequate  direction to the essay

Not too specific or it will be difficult to develop into a series of a paragraph

·         Thesis Statements examples

Topic: controlling our Children

1.1. Too General thesis: Children must be disciplined

1.2.  Too Specific thesis: Teachers have a role in the discipline of children

1.3.  Precise thesis: By using disciplinary techniques, parents, teachers and police are the main agents, for controlling children.

Provide three groups to discuss, general enough to allow for the development of several ideas and specific enough to give the essay structure and organization.

(i)      Main Idea 1: There are a variety of techniques to parents who are willing to take responsibility for disciplining their children.

(ii)    Main Idea 2: Teachers are also important agents of discipline for today’s society.

(iii)    Main Idea 3: If criminal behavior is involved, police take responsibility to control children through the legal system.

·          Writing a precise thesis statement is the key to step in developing an effective essay.

·         Introduction to an Essay:

1.       Introduction Paragraph: 

2.       The first part of an essay

3.       The reader’s first contact with your perspective- FIRST IMPRESSIONS!

4.       Major influence on the reader’s desire to keep reading

5.       Reader begins to evaluate the essay, based on the introduction.

v  Attention’s getters for an introductory paragraphs

1.1.1.1.             Provide some interesting background about the topic in the form of a general statement: Today’s children become tomorrow’s new leaders

1.1.1.2.             Use a thought provoking quotation: “Adolescence is not a stage of life, it is a disease” Dr. S. Rosner.

1.1.1.3.             Ask a question your topic: Why children don’t want to be controlled by adults?

1.1.1.4.             State a puzzling fact or a statement: Teenagers joins gangs, because they need the support of a family.

v  Attention Getters for an Introductory Paragraph

1.1.1.1.1.1. State a common misconception: Children don’t learn habits from adults.

1.1.1.1.1.2. Describe a problem: Everyone knows what a juvenile delinquency has become in our society.

1.1.1.1.1.3. Give an analogy: Children are just like animals

1.1.1.1.1.4. Show how the topic is related to reader’s experience:  Most people know how difficult it is to raise children.

v  Make a bridge to connect the attention getting sentence(s) to your thesis statement.

1.1.1.1.1.                   Common way to make a bridge is to show why the topic is important: Controlling the behavior of children is one society’s most important task.

1.1.1.1.2.                   Conclude the introductory paragraph with the most important idea of the essay- THESIS STATEMENT.

v  Introductory paragraph example:

1.4. (Attention getter- stating problem) Most people know what a juvenile delinquency has become in our society. (Attention getter- stating General statement) Without proper control, children will run wild and create dangers for them and everyone around. (Bridge or transition problem) Controlling the behavior of children is one society’s most important task. (Thesis statement) By using disciplinary techniques, parents, teachers and police are the main agents, for controlling children.

v  Body of an Essay

1.       Set of paragraphs that develop the main expressed in the thesis statement: 

2.       Make a list of ideas that support the thesis statement: Each main idea becomes the main idea of each paragraph.

3.       Arrange the main ideas in logical order (time, place,)

4.       Plan out each body paragraph by listing major details that supports the main idea.

5.       Order the details in each paragraph I a logical way. Each main paragraph may end with a concluding sentence.

v  Essay Outilne:

Ø  Thesis Statement: By using disciplinary techniques, parents, teachers and police are the main agents, for controlling teachers.

Ø  Body Paragraph 1: Main Idea 1: There are a variety of discipline techniques available to parents who are willing to take responsibility of disciplining their children. Major Details: 1-Give rewards, 2- Punish bad behavior, 3- Be consistent and reasonable.

Ø  Body Paragraph 2: Main idea 2: Teachers are also important agents of discipline: 1- Direct communication: 2-Nonverbal communication: 3- Grades.

Ø  Body Paragraph 3: Main Idea 3: If criminal behavior is involved, police will take responsibility to control children:  Various forms of punishment: Advising parents of children’s behavior: Setting an enforcing curfews.

v  Essay: Writing stage

§  After planning and arranging your main ideas and major details, beginning writing your body paragraphs.

§  The number of paragraphs depends on the topic’s complexity, inclusiveness, and your purpose for writing.

§  Usually a short essay contains from 3 to 5 paragraphs, plus an introductory and concluding paragraph.

§  Remember to use signals words to make smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs.

§  Signal Transition words:

¨       For examples: For example, for instance, to illustrate.

¨       For organization or chronological order: The six’s steps are…, next, first, secondly, third.

¨       For additional points: Furthermore, in addition, also, moreover.

¨        For Opposing ideas: On the other hand, in contrast, although, however.

¨       For similar ideas: Likewise, similarly, in comparison.

¨       For exceptions: However, nevertheless, still, yet

¨       For emphasis: Above all, finally, more importantly.

¨       For understanding: In other words, in essence, briefly.

¨       For summarizing: In conclusion, to sum up, for these reasons, in a nutshell.

¨       For exams: remember this, this is important, this could be on the test.

v  Essay Body Paragraph:

Ø  1)main idea There are a variety of discipline techniques available to parents who are willing to take responsibility of disciplining their children. 2)major detail (bifurcation) Most of these methods involves a combinations of rewards and punishments.3) minor detailsRewards behaviors will be repeated by children; therefore, rewards should be given for behaviors that are acceptable. 4) minor detailsUnacceptable behavior should be punished in some way. 5)minor details Try to fit the punishment fit the seriousness of the behavior.6)major detail Be reasonable, but consistent too. 7) concluding sentence Consistent and fairness are the key elements when it comes to rewarding and punishing children.

Ø  Body paragraphs:

¨       Provide the content of the Essay

¨       Each paragraph should be unique, including different facts or opinions, as appropriate.

¨       Like any paragraph, should be unified around a main idea and arranged coherently.

v  Conclusion of an Essay:

§  Purpose: To leave the reader with a positive impression, a sense of completeness, and the inclination to think about the topic.

§  Usually a short, single paragraph

§  Should not give more information about the topic – that should be done in the body of the paragraph.

§  Should follow logically from the body of the essay

§  Concluding Paragraph:

§  Can be a restatement of the essay

§  Can use signal words, such as in conclusion, in summary or in closing.

§  Restate your thesis statement in different words

§   Write some thought provoking comments about your topic stating your comments, opinions and judgments, or recommendations.

§  Concluding paragraph: Example :

1)      Partial restatement of the thesis statement With proper discipline at home and at school, children can be controlled. 2) A conclusion that clarifies the thesis Parents and teachers can do the job before action police is necessary. 3)

2)      An opinion about the nature of society, which may motivate readers to read some more about the topic  Maybe many children are out of control because not enough people take their responsibility seriously. 4) A concluding remark about the topic In conclusion, controlling children, is one of the most important social responsibilities for adults.

   

Ø  Revision and Editing Process: The process of reviewing and rewriting to make your ideas more logical, understandable, and interesting to your readers.

Ø  Revision and Editing Process: Involves crossing out some material, adding other material and rearranging material.

Ø  Two main aspects of the Revision Process: Through reading, through collaboration.

Ø  As you read to revise, keep in mind: Your purpose for writing, Your audience, To carefully read multiple times, with each rereading you will find ways to improve your essay.

Ø  Collaboration: What others think about your essay, other perspective and awareness of weakness, FINAL DRAFT, ERROR FREE.

Ø  Types of Essays:

Ø  Descriptive Essay: description through senses:

Ø  Narrative Essay: long conversational story containing features as characters, setting, context and big idea.

Ø  Cause and Effects Essay: Causality, why did…, what happened then?

Ø  Compare and contrast, through similarities or differences or compound version.

Ø  Classification Essays: analysis in which information is ordered into categories for its appropriate definition.

Ø  Planning solution: considerations about a problematic situation

Ø  Persuasive Essays: An attempt to convince others to share your opinion.

Ø  Mixed Essays: combinations, identify your topic and then write

1st writing assignment

You can check my essay on art and inclusion: Private Revolution. Click here.

Entry #9 MLA Research Paper (Daly): New Alternative Conclusion

Owing to public controversy, state legislators have to look closely the problem of irresponsible drivers. Public awareness repudiates the use of phones while on the road because of this misbehavior have caused traffic deaths and multiple injuries. From cartoons to scientists, they all have agreed on the dangerous consequences of using a cell phone while driving. Scientists confirmed that those drivers using cell phones are as dangerous as drunk drivers. Despite expert opinions, media neglected scientists fact by means of a syllogism without taking notice of statics, the families of the victims and the fallibility of law around states.   Matt Sundeen of the National Conference of State Legislatures (qtd. In Layton C9) stated that “It’s definitely an issue that is gaining steam around the country”. States Legislators need to act now to regulate the use of cell phones in moving vehicles.

Sources:
Matt Richel (2013). Driven to distraction. [ONLINE] Retrieved from: http://topics.nytimes.com/top/news/technology/series/driven_to_distraction/index.html. [Last Accessed 13 June 2013].

Entry #8 Peer Assesment

PEER ASSESSMENT

·                     Paste your paragraph on immigration.

·                     Give it an appropriate title.

·                     Go into a mate’s blog and assess his/her paragraph.

·                     Use the tools/criteria discussed in class. 

·                     Go back to your own blog and make the necessary changes (following your mate's/mates' suggestions) to improve it. 

NB: DO NOT ERASE your original paragraph, leave both versions.

First Version:

Immigration: A reflection

Immigration is a displacement of people into new surroundings triggering a social reaction. Societies are ordered by ephemeral conventions which are given by organizations that influence the reality and their perception between good or evil. Unfortunately, this manufactured purpose of the universe is only a limited perspective of an always-changing world that escapes the law of families, schools, countries and above all, the limited perception of capitalism. Idealizations are produced for those with a relative power creating a false sense of equilibrium. Thus, Children at school are taught how Columbus discovered America, ignoring the genocide of thousands of natives. Also, Children are taught how good Sarmiento was at school, ignoring his proto-Nazi ideology. His book, Facundo, is a clear representation of how “the others” have to be seen: as the enemy. Nevertheless, the book that is the icon in Argentina is the Martín Fierro which coincides with a clear hate towards the immigrants. Both ideologies follow the same ideal of blaming “the other” without having in mind whether they are guilty or not. Discrimination is a logical device to differentiate and separate two statements from each other. However, this is an individual discrimination to rationalize to make a decision, to give a mark to your student at school, to decide between going out with this girl or that girl which is quite different from producing a whole idealization, blaming a whole group of people, based on a proximal fear of losing your own tangible resources: icons of essence and/or existence. Fear is motivation for those whose existence is supplied by a structure not knowing that life is not a fairy tale and all empires and societies sooner or later are condemned to fall. Critical thought not only help us to realize what is good or evil but also to discover how the whole society and media lie to us. From this point, we are given the opportunity to discover the truth and to try once for all to start thinking about the world and about us. The purpose of the universe is not in Sarmiento hymn but in how we manage to keep alive, all alive, all together. Indeed, society is bound to change through Immigration.

Sol Fos's editing

Immigration: A reflection

Immigration is a displacement of people into new surroundings triggering a social reaction. Societies are ordered by ephemeral conventions which are given by organizations that influence the reality and their perception between good or evil. Unfortunately, this manufactured purpose of the universe is only a limited perspective of an always-changing world that escapes the law of families, schools, countries and above all, the limited perception of capitalism. Idealizations are produced for those with a relative power creating a false sense of equilibrium. Thus, Children at school are taught how Columbus discovered America, ignoring the genocide of thousands of natives. Also, Children are taught how good Sarmiento was at school, ignoring his proto-Nazi ideology. His book, Facundo, is a clear representation of how “the others” have to be seen: as the enemy. Nevertheless, the book that is the icon in Argentina is the Martín Fierro which coincides with a clear hate towards the immigrants. Both ideologies follow the same ideal of blaming “the other” without having in mind whether they are guilty or not. Discrimination is a logical device to differentiate and separate two statements from each other. However, this is an individual discrimination to rationalize to make a decision, to give a mark to your student at school, to decide between going out with this girl or that girl which is quite different from producing a whole idealization, blaming a whole group of people, based on a proximal fear of losing your own tangible resources: icons of essence and/or existence. Fear is motivation for those whose existence is supplied by a structure not knowing that life is not a fairy tale and all empires and societies sooner or later are condemned to fall. Critical thought not only help us realize what is good or evil but also to discover how the whole society and media lie to us. From this point, we are given the opportunity to discover the truth and to try once for all to start thinking about the world and about us. The purpose of the universe is not in Sarmiento hymn but in how we manage to keep alive, all alive, all together. Indeed, society is bound to change through Immigration.

Hernandez, J. (1872) Martín Fierro. Argentina: Terramar (2007)

Sarmiento, D.F. (1845) Facundo. Argentina: Ediciones Clásicas (2001)

Entry #7 Metacognitive Analysis:

1. Paragraph ONE: YOUR PARAGRAPH (TOPIC SENTENCE + BODY +  CONCLUSION SENTENCE)

   Rationalism ,in the hands of the right ones, help us to find ephemeral truths from our reality. A person claims a statement after a detailed observation through logical experimentation. The following example will enlighten us:  “Canal Encuentro” released a few series of documentaries about myths and facts, among them, The Loch Ness Monster documentary made a real impression on me: A scientist went to the Loch Ness River and observed its biosphere, and came to the conclusion that the Loch Ness Monster would never sustain its existence in such a place. The monster would simply starve to death without any resource to keep itself alive. The scientist observed and applied his logic in order to produce convincing arguments to support the fact that “The Loch Ness monster will never survive in such a place”. In rationalism, the scientist produced a statement supported by arguments that were the result of logical experimentation. On the other hand, ordinary people have an interesting way of twisting arguments to produce a fact.  Cynics produce a statement which is supported by an irrational distrust with a negative connotation. A partial number of Argentineans in reference to certain subjects would produce vulgar statements such as : “Hay que matarlos a todos”, “son todos vagos”, “que negros de mierda!” or “estos afanan a lo loco, como se rascan…”  and immediately reinforce those statements with cynical smiles using short phrases such as: “no vamos a cambiar nada”, “es el país que nos toco”, or “es así”. The lack of arguments can be often replaced by conclusions that denote economic sensibility nurtured by an aggressive capitalist culture. The problem is not that ordinary Argentineans have this thought; the problem is that graduated people, with relevant positions in this society such as teachers, politicians or journalists, act based on irrational principles that would irremediably produce drastic effects in our lives. The irresponsibility of these people is the consequence of impunity in our culture, but that is not valid justification for their current irresponsibility in their duties, Heidegger classified this attitude in which the being-there consumes not to understand the world but in order to see. Consequently, people have the impossibility to understand by themselves because they only consume information to satisfy their immediate desires. The importance of a valid source to support arguments to reach the truth and opinions has to be taught by those whose roles have an effect on our population; A serious rational compromise with the truth has to be led by politicians, teachers and anyone with influence to support freedom, diversity in thinking and real peace. 

Source:

Heidegger, M. (1927). El ser y el tiempo: El ser-ahí y la caída del ser-ahí – la avidez de novedades.    México: Editorial Efe (2010)

1. Paragraph TWO:    YOUR MATE'S TOPIC SENTENCE + YOUR BODY+ YOUR MATE'S CONCLUSION SENTENCE

   A social understanding of the importance of reason can lead us to a better reality. A person claims a statement after a detailed observation through logical experimentation. The following example will enlighten us:  “Canal Encuentro” released a few series of documentaries about myths and facts, among them, The Loch Ness Monster documentary made a real impression on me: A scientist went to the Loch Ness River and observed its biosphere, and came to the conclusion that the Loch Ness Monster would never sustain its existence in such a place. The monster would simply starve to death without any resource to keep itself alive. The scientist observed and applied his logic in order to produce convincing arguments to support the fact that “The Loch Ness monster will never survive in such a place”. In rationalism, the scientist produced a statement supported by arguments that were the result of logical experimentation. On the other hand, ordinary people have an interesting way of twisting arguments to produce a fact.  Cynics produce a statement which is supported by an irrational distrust with a negative connotation. A partial number of Argentineans in reference to certain subjects would produce vulgar statements such as : “Hay que matarlos a todos”, “son todos vagos”, “que negros de mierda!” or “estos afanan a lo loco, como se rascan…”  and immediately reinforce those statements with cynical smiles using short phrases such as: “no vamos a cambiar nada”, “es el país que nos toco”, or “es así”. The lack of arguments can be often replaced by conclusions that denote economic sensibility nurtured by an aggressive capitalist culture. The problem is not that ordinary Argentineans have this thought; the problem is that graduated people, with relevant positions in this society such as teachers, politicians or journalists, act based on irrational principles that would irremediably produce drastic effects in our lives. The irresponsibility of these people is the consequence of impunity in our culture, but that is not valid justification for their current irresponsibility in their duties, Heidegger classified this attitude in which the being-there consumes not to understand the world but in order to see. Consequently, people have the impossibility to understand by themselves because they only consume information to satisfy their immediate desires. The importance of a valid source to support arguments to reach the truth and opinions has to be taught by those whose roles have an effect on our population; Societies are more favourable to succeed in their administrations with a consciousness in the importance of rationalism. 

1. Paragraph THREE: metacongnitive analysis

METACOGNITIVE ANALYSIS:

·                     Does the overall meaning vary?

·                     Is one sentence better than the other? Why?

·                     Which sentence(s) best reflects the content of the paragraph?

·                     Are there good synonyms, antonyms, hyponyms in the 1st and last sentences?

·                     Has wording been avoided?

·                     Is there any repetition?

·                     Is every element in the paragraph included in the TS? And in the Conclusion sentence?

NB: You need not answer EVERY QUESTION. They're just a guide.

Metacognitive Analysis

There is no difference in meaning in both sentences, both follow the same argument. In my opinion, I prefer the second TS and CS because not only reflect the content of the paragraph but also avoid wordiness. Repetition is  another good point to remark that the second TS and CS is way much better than the former ones, making the point clearer.

ISFD 41
Fos, María Soledad
Moyano, Federico